WARNING- THIS REVIEW IS SPOILER HEAVY FOR BOTH THE BOOK
SERIES AND THE FILM. IF YOU DON’T WANT TO KNOW THE INTIMATE DETAILS OF EITHER
ONE, STOP NOW. I have done a spoiler-free review of The Dark Tower film HERE,
and that would be a better place to go for my thoughts on the film. If you read
on, consider yourself fairly warned. Also possible language and fan-ranting,
although I will try to explain myself when I do.
To start with, I’m going to come right out and say it. This
movie is fine. It’s fine. Which is good in that I’m not here going ‘it’s
horrible’, but at the same time I really feel like this movie should have been
a lot better than a mere ‘okay’. My first issue is the runtime. I was starting
to feel not too bad about this film in the final lead up to it; I’d made my
peace with the fact that this wasn’t going to be an adaptation but a
continuation of the story and that this was going to be the next cycle of
Roland’s quest that began with the end of the seventh book. I was willing to
give it a chance to see where it was going to go. Two days before we went we
checked how long the movie was to help plan things out and that’s when all
those doubts came screaming back. Ninety-five minutes. That’s it. And it
pissed me off, and in a weird way was almost offensive. They plan to open up
this huge, expansive world that touches on basically everything Stephen King
writes or has written in one way or another, and all you’ve got to do so is
ninety-five minutes? This movie should have been at least two hours, easily.
Then perhaps we wouldn’t have had to condense and simplify so much, and many
things that were more like Easter eggs would have been better explained. Like
when Walter uses Maerlyn’s Rainbow, especially Black Thirteen. If you had no
idea about the series (and I have such a person to bounce these questions off
of), then the importance of things like this get lost. Or the rose painted on
the door at the end.
whose importance to the story is in the neighborhood of 'very fucking' |
There’s so many things that should have been more
than references, things that have so much importance to the story. You don’t
even hear Roland’s father called by name, which is kind of silly considering
how often in the books he introduces himself as ‘Roland, son of Steven’. How
hard would that have been? They managed to sneak in some Mid-World speech
patterns at the village, after all. It’s just so… bare bones. I get that you
don’t want to alienate non-fans, but there wasn’t really much for anyone to sink their teeth into, unless they were watching for all those little
nods. And that just makes you wish they’d explained those better.
I'll trade some of these nods for more story any day |
It’s not all doom and gloom. The cast for this film is
really, really good. Tom Taylor as Jake does really well. You just have to
remember, this isn’t the same Jake. This is not book Jake, the kid from 1977
whose father ran a TV station. This is a Jake from presumably today, from a
different Earth (in contemplating the lore, I believe book Jake couldn’t have
come from Keystone Earth). But he has a lot of the qualities of the Jake we know.
In the movie, they call psychic abilities ‘the Shine’ as opposed to ‘the
Touch’, presumably to establish the fact that all of King’s stories are
connected and that ‘the Shine’ would be familiar to people without too much
explanation. As I said in my spoiler free review, I had so much fun with
Matthew McConaughey’s portrayal as Walter O’Dim. I thought that was great
casting and he was clearly having a lot of fun with it. I never thought he was
too goofy or over the top and I really liked his menace. I would have loved to
see him in some of the scenes from the book; raising Nort from the dead and the
palaver with Roland at the Golgotha especially. I think those would have been
fantastic with this cast.
Speaking of the cast, I have to talk about Roland. I have no
issue with his casting, I’ll get that out of the way right off the bat. When
this project was first announced, I’ll admit that my dream casting was Viggo
Mortensen (as Clint Eastwood is a bit too old now and Scott Eastwood isn’t
quite old enough) and I thought he would have made a great Roland. But Idris
Elba was fantastic, and you can’t deny that. He really does embody that
character awesomely. The only problems I have with him aren’t due to Idris
Elba, they’re story issues. I alluded to this problems in the spoiler-free
review but now I can elaborate on them further. I may have been irritated by
the short runtime and dumbing down of the story, but in a way I can understand
them. What I find to be unforgivable, and maybe this is just me as a fan, is
the horribly out-of-character aspects of Roland’s story. The first is Roland
saying he’s not a gunslinger anymore. Excuse me? Being a gunslinger, especially
as the last, is fundamental to Roland’s being. He would never deny what
he was. Gunslinger isn’t just a title here, folks, it’s more than a way of
life, it’s a symbol. You can see it when they meet people on their journey to
the Tower. Gunslingers are almost mythical now, emblems of a time before the
world moved on. For Roland to deny what he is, is to deny himself at a
fundamental level and I don’t buy that. The second thing is that in the film he’s
neither looking for the Man in Black or the Tower. Okay, being a gunslinger
is fundamental to Roland’s being, but finding the Tower is why he gets out of
bed in the morning. Finding the Man in Black is his goal the entirety of the
first book. And I know, you’re going to say ‘well this is a continuation, maybe
in this cycle Roland isn’t looking for these things’. Bull. Shit. If I
may, let me quote The Dark Tower, the final book in the series (Coda:
page 827):
'How many times had he climbed these stairs only to find
himself peeled back, curved back, turned back? No to the beginning (when things
might have been changed and time’s cursed lifted), but to that moment in the
Mohaine Desert when he had finally understood that his thoughtless,
questionless quest would ultimately succeed?'
I took that to mean that he was always sent back to the point
of no return, that he was far enough into his quest that he would no longer
turn back or away from it. Why then would this version of Roland be anything
other than single-mindedly looking for that which he has been looking for since
he left Gilead for the last time? And he
basically says he’s abandoned his quest and that the world’s moved on and there’s
nothing to be done? Book Roland would look movie Roland right in the eye and
tell him he’s forgotten the face of his father. And I agree. You can throw out
all the excuses about the timeline and this being a continuation, but fucking
up two of the most basic parts of Roland’s personality are unforgivable to me
and the biggest issues I have with this movie. Perhaps this makes me an
insufferably pedantic purist, but these are crucial character elements, as
important to the character of Roland as those big, sandalwood-grip guns he
carries.
I'll get off my soapbox now |
Overall, despite my issues with the film, it really isn’t
bad. As I said, it’s fine. But I do wish it had been better. What did I want to
see, then? Basically, I wanted the story of the books on the screen, I wanted
the Gunslinger’s tale done with all the love and detail that Lord of the
Rings had. I wanted to see Tull, it’s people, and the battle that took
place there. I wanted to hear drunken, ragtime Hey Jude and meet the
farmer, Brown, and his raven Zoltan. I wanted to see the waystation and the Slow
Muties under the mountains and the sacrifice of Jake. I wanted the movie to
start with the opening line, hear Jake say ‘Go
then. There are other worlds than these’. They even use the last part of
that line as a tagline on the poster, but never in the movie.
I ran this by my
non-fan source and he took that line very differently from someone who knows
the meaning behind those words. And I realize that doing a faithful adaptation
of the first book probably would have pushed it close if not into an R rating,
and I get that they probably didn’t want to go there. I just wanted something more
from this film, and I hope if they go forward with the myriad plans they have
to continue this universe, that they actually do something with it.
Because you know what else I want, later on? I want Eddie and Susannah, I want
the ka-tet on screen, I want to see Blaine the Mono and Lud and Shardik
the cyborg bear.
Sorry, giant cyborg bear |
If you’re going to make films in this world, give us this
world. There’s so much there, don’t waste it.
In the end, would I recommend this film? Yeah. It’s a good
time if a simple story. Idris Elba gets to be totally badass and awesome and
Matthew McConaughey gets to be slimy and evil and it’s great that way. There’s
the start of something good here, we just need to bring it out and really show
the amazing world that Stephen King created for these characters to inhabit. I
stand by my rating of 7.5/10. Just make the next one better.
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